Saturday, May 26, 2007

stress

I realised I have never completely comprehend what it means to be under alot of stress.

I can safely say that throughout my student life, I was never under any kind of stress at all.

My student stress was actually a conscious decision to be stressed out.

"Oh... deadline coming, havent done no shit. shit i'm screwed. I'm stressed!"
"Oh no.. I have 8 papers to sit for in 2 weeks! I'm so stressed!"
"Oh crap! 15,000 words essay to be written in a week! i'm super stressed!"

and there's nothing that an all-nighter cannot solve really! ( it's tested and proven!)

and i never have to think about school work when i do get the chance to sleep.

and I never get panic attacks so bad that I couldnt concentrate on what I was doing
and I never have to hide in the toilet to calm myself down
and I never have to stop what I was doing to just breathe
and I never have tears threatening to fall down every 4 seconds

but the worst feeling of all, is to be dead tired, and not be able to sleep at all.

It's like once i close my eyes, a wave of tasks undone come rushing.

I have 250 unread mails in my office inbox.

My office phone showed that I have 20 missed calls today.

It can only mean 2 things:



1) I wasnt at my desk


or


2) I am screwed!



.......and I was at my desk.

And it's 4.33am and I have to get up to blog to get my mind off work.

Maybe it's the "yuan yang" drink (this hk drink where they mix coffee and tea together) that I had for lunch, or that green tea I had for dinner that's keeping me awake.

maaaan i really need to sleep...... please let me sleep....





(such huge contrast from the last entry huh? oh such is life....)

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

i wanted to say 'hahaha' but this is just too depressing to laugh.

Daffy said...

Call me whenever ok? Don't wait till 10pm, after a whole day of feeling this way before finding for help. Call meeee call meeeee call meeeeee....

CChuah said...

Call me call me on 1-800-CHRISCANHELP..

I am in GMT timezone, so at 4am i would be...having dinner... : )

On a serious note though miss - chill out coz u know there's nothing in life we can't solve...

fe li ci a said...

hahaha... chris.. that's funny man....

yea.. thanx thanx.. i guess i'll be fine soon. hahah..daph.. called you liao wat! hahahaha...

aniwae...thanx!

PJ said...

no need to be stress lah.

one step at a time.

one day at a time.

breath...

nothing is impossible. deep down in our hearts we know the solution to every problem.

can also call/e-mail me whenever.

send me stress-release e-mail. i can take it one. i will just laugh.. ;-p

xxxx

fe li ci a said...

thanx pj..-_-... so nice to hear that you will just laugh at my stress-release email..

it's ok.. i also can take it one.

ahahahahah.. .thaaaaaaanx pj!!!...

yea.. i think i'm feeling a tad better nowadays..thank goodness.. =)

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